Archive | September, 2011

YES:Scanwiches

29 Sep

Via the Daily Good and Scanwiches. Of course

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The 100 Dames of Pvt. O’Rourke

29 Sep

Matt Webb

Inspired by the superb headlines of 1950s magazine ‘Man’s Life‘, Dance Ricky Dance proudly presents “The 100 Dames of Pvt. O’Rourke.” This is the first in a series of writings by the DRD columnists based on the headlines of this magnificent publication. Enjoy!

The 100 Dames of Pvt. O’Rourke

Private O’Rourke ducked into a narrow alley and hid in a shady doorway. He crouched on the balls of his feet, trying to ease his laboured breathing and slow his heart, which was hammering at the inside of his ribcage like a…well… a hammer, essentially. He cocked his head, straining his hearing for the slightest sound that would indicate that his pursuers were gaining on him. His head was swimming; his thoughts inevitably turning back to the fateful day a mere week ago, when his life had changed forever…

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YES: Retro men’s mags.

27 Sep

I’m sort of in love with their headlines. Particularly-THOSE SLIMEY RODENTS ARE EATING MY FLESH! and SEX CAN BE FUN!  Via How to be a retronaut

30 things to do with your bits

22 Sep

Jacq Kelly, Matt Webb and Ellie Hutchinson

Lady magazines are always full of tip top advice and today we stumbled upon a list of 50 things to do with your breasts. For reals. It was primarily ridiculous. So here are our top 30 things to do with a) breasts and b) cocks.

Breasts

1)    They can be a useful place to keep your bras when they’re not in your underwear drawer

2)   Do the truffle shuffle! Nothing is more hilarious than shaking all your lady lumps. It’s a great way to break the ice in formal  situations

2)     Attach tassels to them and whirl them around a Gentleman’s club

3)    Use them as a handy pen holder

4)     Close doors- they can serve as great pushing devices when you’ve got your hands full Continue reading

The League of Mediocrity

20 Sep

Matt Webb

The scene: The living room of Matt Webb’s flat. Matt Webb, Mai-Ling Collyer, Jacq Kelly and Ellie Hutchinson are discussing a recent dramatic event in their lives.

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Dos and dont’s of dating.

19 Sep

Jacq Kelly

In response to this on dating Mark Hamill, here are the do’s and dont’s of dating Jacq Kelly.

DON’T DO
Be a c*** Have one
Ever think it is ok to say a single word in defence of Nick Clegg Have the grace to ‘forget’ that I was ever a member of the Liberal Democrats, and know that whatever basic truths I got wrong in the past, now I am right about everything
Be a better writer than me Feel free to be a better shag than me
Ever tell me the end of the book/film/box set. Seriously. Listen with your ears – if I say I don’t want to hear it I damn-well mean it.
Be a white person in charge of a black worker’s union Be tolerant
Ever put the milk in before the water Put the water on the tea bag as it comes to the boil
Smoke Drink
Be religious Worship me
Talk loudly on buses Always have a wee snack to hand in case I get peckish on journeys
Live in a closet Like the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe

Fashion

19 Sep

So it’s fashion week or something. It seems to be happening everywhere.

Two things I know about fashion:

1) These shoes exist.

2) It has something to do with good hair

YES: Sunday wrestling

18 Sep

I think my favourite thing might be how awkward they all look.

Everyday resistance or bravo charity shop

16 Sep

Whilst perusing my local second hand book shop saw this:
20110916-162955.jpg

Well played charity book shop employee, well played.

Feminism: Don’t be a douche (part 2)

15 Sep

Ellie Hutchinson

You can read Feminism: Don’t be douche (part 1) here

Last week I decided to take on the thankless task of finding non a-hole behaviour in this world of ours. It is decidedly lacking. Never the less, I’m nothing if not a tryer, so here are my top 5 feminist/non-douche moments of the week.

Whilst pop culture continues to alienate pretty much everyone, this has been a bad but good week for the laydeeez in real life terms. In other words- lobbying has worked. Yay collective voices! Continue reading