Dos and dont’s of dating.

19 Sep

Jacq Kelly

In response to this on dating Mark Hamill, here are the do’s and dont’s of dating Jacq Kelly.

DON’T DO
Be a c*** Have one
Ever think it is ok to say a single word in defence of Nick Clegg Have the grace to ‘forget’ that I was ever a member of the Liberal Democrats, and know that whatever basic truths I got wrong in the past, now I am right about everything
Be a better writer than me Feel free to be a better shag than me
Ever tell me the end of the book/film/box set. Seriously. Listen with your ears – if I say I don’t want to hear it I damn-well mean it.
Be a white person in charge of a black worker’s union Be tolerant
Ever put the milk in before the water Put the water on the tea bag as it comes to the boil
Smoke Drink
Be religious Worship me
Talk loudly on buses Always have a wee snack to hand in case I get peckish on journeys
Live in a closet Like the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe
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