Rubbish TV review of the week: Chuck

13 Jun

Ellie Hutchinson

Set up: Chuck is a one hour programme on channel 5 about a normal man who has some sort of spy wear in his brain. I didn’t really get how or why, but there are video cameras in his bedroom, and he has a terminator style face recognition thing going on.

Characters: Everybody is absolutely beautiful. But also really not. They’re kind of..waxy. No facial movements or pores here people. Apart from Chuck! And his friends who are clearly lifted from the 40 year old virgin. Annoyingly, NO PAUL RUDD.  -10 points

Chuck himself is “dude number 3”, the regular- nothing- to- see- here-kind of bloke. But I think I might fancy him. Tall and slim hipped=swoon. He is also ten tonnes more attractive than his sister’s boyfriend who is probably called Shep and definitely uses wet look gel. Also probably ‘makes love’. To Usher. However, the sister is called Ellie. +3 points.

Story: I don’t know, something about being locked in a vault and implanting a bug in some bad guy’s heart. Also featured: pole dancing and feelings. I have no feeling about the plot. 0 points.

Feel: A bit like Monk. Which I LOVED. Especially his kooky but normal assistant. Who in turn was a bit like Sister Steve. And she was all kinds of awesome.  +10 points

SUMMARY

3 points. It’s no CSI.

 

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